Lament
by Ebony Mitsu
Summary: When the one you love is gone forever, those left behind must find a way to live on.


Ami sat on the end of her bed, clutching a photograph in one hand and a handkerchief in the other. She sniffed as she stared at the captured memory.

_'You promised you'd never leave me, koi. You _promised_.' _she thought miserably. _'But you left me anyway.'_

She blinked away her tears and focused on the time when the picture was taken. A happy time, many years ago. At Usagi's 21st birthday. She and her koi had been conned into playing musical chairs, a childish game that turned into a lot of fun. She had surprisingly gotten through to the final round, like her koibito, and her koi had won. The photo showed Ami sitting on her koi's lap and they were both laughing and her koi had put her arms around her to prevent Ami from getting up or falling off.

"Mama?"

Ami looked up at the small voice by the door. A little boy, barely eight years old with his six year old sister in tow. The boy had dark navy blue hair and dark blue eyes, with just the barest hint of green at the edges of their irises. The little girl had long auburn hair and eyes that were green with tints of blue. They were looking at her, worried and upset.

_'Of course, you didn't just leave me,'_ Ami thought sadly, _'you left them too.'_

"Mama, are you ok?" asked the boy again. Ami summoned up the will for a smile and beckoned them to her. The young children came.

"Yes, Keitaro, i'm fine. I just miss your mama-papa, that's all." she explained, using the nickname the children had given their other mother at a young age, for she had always been the more masculine figure in their lives.

"You sure?" asked the little girl, looking up into Ami's eyes with her own. Eyes that reminded Ami so much of . . .

_'Don't even go there.'_ Ami told herself sternly.

"Mama, how did you two meet?" the little girl asked suddenly. She was looking at the picture in Ami's hand.

Ami looked at her for a few seconds, trying to remember what they were talking about, and then looked at the photograph in her hand. "It was a very long time ago. Didn't we tell you this story Kiyoko?"

"Yes, but i like the story." Kiyoko replied with six-year-old simplicity. When she caught her older brother's warning look she said "What?"

"It's fine, Kei." Ami laughed. _'I can actually laugh . . . maybe things will get better.' _

"So can you tell us the story?" asked Kiyoko, her eyes sparkling. Ami looked away; her koi's eyes had sparkled in the exact same way.

She sighed and sat on the bed, patting either side of her for her children to sit beside her. "It was a long time ago, long before you two were born, before Neo Princess Serenity was born, before Neo Queen Serenity became who she is today." Ami paused to take a deep breath. The two children were watching her, Kiyoko with rapt attention, Keitaro with a saddened but determined expression. _'So much like his mother.'_

"It was the twentieth century on Earth, back when the world was divided. We lived in Old Tokyo then, I attended Juuban Junior High with Serenity-sama. Your mama-papa joined later in the year." Ami could still remember the rumours now.

_She's a bully._

_I heard she got kicked out of her last school for fighting._

"It was Serenity-sama who introduced us. She befriended your mama-papa even though everyone else was afraid of her. Serenity-sama was always like that, always seeing only the good in people. She has always disliked violence. She had met your mama-papa earlier that day, when a group of bullies started to pick on her. Your mama-papa defended her and scared them away." Ami managed a laugh. "Serenity-sama always said that one of the things that drew her to her was those earrings she always wore."

"The pretty roses, right mama?" Kiyoko said excitedly. Ami's breath hitched and then she relaxed, a tired smile making itself known.

"Yes, the roses." she nodded. Some warmth came back into her tired blue eyes. "I didn't see Serenity-sama until after school that day. I walked into the arcade with Rei-chan."

"Crown Arcade, right mama?" asked the boy tentatively. Ami smiled and nodded, putting an arm around them.

"Yes, although it was much smaller back then, and it was a proper arcade, not the restaurant it is now, with games and booths." she recalled the scene perfectly in her mind. Motoki had passed away peacefully a few years ago and his daughter now ran the restaurant. "That place was the setting for so many memories of our lives before all this." Ami gestured out the window. The Crystal Palace was visible over the rooftops. "Your mama-papa was playing a game so we didn't see her at first. She often challanged Serenity-sama to the same game. The old _Sailor V Video-Game_. And then Serenity-sama introduced us."

She could still remember when her koi had first looked up from cursing the video-game, her face showing mild surprise. The colour of her eyes had never dimmed, always the same captivating shade of dark emerald, and her long hair had only grown longer as they grew older. Ami remembered her walking over to herself, Rei and Usagi and introducing herself, and Ami remembered the blush that rose on her cheeks as she looked at her. She was tall, but she had been so elegant that her height had never seemed to matter. Ami was one of the few who hadn't found her height intimidating.

"What was she like?" asked Keitaro, looking at the image of her in the photo.

"Well," Ami began, looking out the window, "She was very loyal, always was. She'd never hesitate to defend those she loved, and she did just that time and time again. And she was a hopeless romantic." Ami laughed. "Whenever she saw a cute guy she'd always say that he looked just like her old boyfriend."

Ami remembered her proposal, on the moon during the time when the Earth was covered in ice and crystal. Looking up at the stars and the Earth in the palace gardens. _Ami, my koi, will you be mine? For I am yours..._

"She was an amazing dancer, and she could always make me smile." Ami said finally. "We didn't get together until just before Serenity-sama turned twenty. I'd never seen her so nervous. It wasn't long before the Earth became encased in sleep."

_Ami I... I like you. A lot. As more than a friend . . ._

"She was pretty." said Kiyoko simply. Ami looked at the photo again and sighed, tears threatening to fall.

"Yes, she was very beautiful." she said, so quietly it was almost to herself. "And as refreshing as a summer storm. She had the same sparkling vitality as the lightning she embodied. I see her every time i look at you." she said, looking at Kiyoko seriously. The little girl smiled and a tear slipped down her cheek. Ami wiped it away with a smile. "Don't cry, she wouldn't want you to be sad. She'd want you to remember all the fun we had together, like baking and hiking together, and the parties she'd help throw for you and the stories she used to tell you. Remember those?"

The children nodded.

"Good. Those are the memories you should remember. That is how you should remember her, as the woman with a zest for life and fun and the mother who loved you both dearly." Ami pulled the two children to her in a hug and held them for a long time. At long last she let them go and sniffed, summoning a smile to her tired face. "Now come on, you two had best get going, or you'll be late going to see Ren-chan and Mizuki-chan."

"Yes mama." they chorused. They both kissed and hugged her goodbye, placed kisses on the smiling face of their mama-papa with their fingertips and left the room.

Ami sighed and placed the photograph back under her pillow.

_Never forget me?_

"I couldn't, Mako-koi. Never." she murmured as she walked over to the window. She watched Keitaro and Kiyoko walk hand-in-hand down the street. She and Makoto had had rooms in the Palace with the other Senshi at the behest of Neo Queen Serenity, or Usagi-chan as she was still known to her closest friends, but they had all bought houses in the city as a way of regaining some normality in their lives. Lives that hadn't been normal since each had touched her henshin item and seen the talking cats. Since the Negaverse had attacked and summoned them together again after a thousand years had passed. And now another thousand had gone by since then. So many of their loved ones had passed away over the course of time. Naru and Umino, Motoki, Shingo. The Senshi had all recieved their elongated life-spans again with the rebirth of Sailor Moon as the Neo Queen of Earth, reverting to their original forms of Lunarian, Mercurian, Venusian, Martian, Jovian, Saturnian, Uranian, Neptunian and Plutonian. Their kingdoms had re-awakened.

So many memories.

A tear trickled down her cheek as she recalled seeing her koibito in the infirmary. Jupiter had been sent on a scouting mission with Mars to investigate some unusual energy readings. They had been ambushed by youma biding their time in the frozen north. The youma had been waiting a long time and were strong. Jupiter had taken a critical shot meant for Mars and had fallen off a glacier. Ami had felt so guilty knowing that her element of Ice had played a part in the events. Jupiter could have survived the fall if it weren't for the poison from the arrow eating at her from within. Her healing abilities as a Senshi were already stretched at fixing the damage, external and internal, caused by the fall and the other battle wounds. But the poison was ancient and strong. Her healing spirit couldn't cope.

_Koi, why are you crying?_

Ami raised a hand to her cheek, the place Makoto had touched to wipe away the tears.

_Don't cry Ami, it'll all work out fine, you'll see_.

Uranus had come crashing into the infirmary from her post at the cross-way into the Silver System. Re-awakening their planets had re-awakened memories that had lain locked and dormant. The Jovian Princess had had an older sister, the Uranian Princess. Sailors Jupiter and Uranus were sisters. They had become as close after that, and Haruka was the godmother of their children along with Michiru. Motoki had also become godparent to Keitaro. Haruka had detransformed and collapsed into a crying heap at Makoto's side.

_Never forget me?_

Ami raised a hand to her reflection in the glass. Her blue eyes were wiser and shone as bright. Her hair was a little longer than it had been during their teenage years, and now had strands of silver mixed with the cerulean-blue. Her skin was a little paler. It only served to make her prettier. She fancied it was Makoto looking back at her, with a warm smile and love in her green eyes, with her hair that had turned dark auburn-brown and her skin that had glowed gold in the sunlight. Makoto raised her hand to the glass and smiled gently.

_Aishiteru, koi . . ._

Tears dripping onto Ami's hand. Ami holding Makoto's limp hand and crying, begging her to come back, to not leave her alone and to return to her and to Keitaro and Kiyoko. And finally only tears and the heart-numbing ache that never stopped. _Makoto i need you . . ._

Makoto growing slowly cold as her life seeped away, losing her golden glow and her sparkling vitality.

_It's like going to sleep . . ._

_I'll be waiting . . ._

_Never forget me?_

Ami could never forget her. Makoto had been her life for so long. When she had gone it had been as though a part of her had been ripped out forever. With the help of her friends and the love of her children she had pulled through. Her beloved was never far from her thoughts, but now Ami tried to remember her with a smile and tried to move on. Sailor Jupiter had died a year ago protecting her Queen and her loved ones. Makoto lived on in their hearts and minds and in the image of Kiyoko and the personality of Keitaro. Only when they forgot her would she truely be gone, and Ami would never allow that to happen. She would always remember the good and the bad. But the good would always stand out more and shine brighter.

_Aishiteru, koi, i'll see you again, you'll see . . ._

"Aishiteru, Makoto, my koibito, my beloved. May you live on in the hearts and minds of those who loved and knew you best and in those you gave your life to protect. Your star has fallen, but it's memory remains in the heavens it guarded so loyally. A precious sparkle that shall take an eternity to truely fade." She whispered, also speaking the words the StarLights had given her in tribute at the funeral. She turned from the window with a sad smile and a heavy heart and made her way out of the room.

_'One day at a time. Step by step we make our way.'_

The light from the afternoon sun shone through the window and carressed a photograph lying on the desk. Ami wore the blue dress she had worn as the Mercurian Princess so long ago, Makoto the gown she had also worn during the Silver Millenium. They were laughing and smiling as the other planetary princesses laughed and smiled and threw flower petals and confettii. Serenity and Endymion were standing off to one side, smiling knowingly and adoringly at the new couple. Motoki and Naru and Umino offered their congratualations of their official Crystal-Earth wedding.

A wedding ring lay on top of the photograph, a silver band with a glowing emerald that sparkled in the sunlight with a defiant and captivating vitality. A precious sparkle that would take an eternity to truely fade.


End file.
